Understanding Justice and Mercy

Lately the seeming chasm and paradox of justice and mercy have been on my mind. I have always kind of wondered why God's justice exists in the first place if it seems so harsh. I have always believed God is a kind, loving, and understanding being. It is hard for me to understand the God that is sometimes described in scripture as an "angry god" or a "jealous" god, one not to be provoked should you desire to avoid his wrath.I have come to understand that justice must exist for everything to be fair. The desire for "fairness" begins at a very young age--as a basic part of human nature. Some people just happen to get away with a lot of stuff and seem to evade the consequences of their actions. Most of the time, the consequences seem to catch up to them at one point or another in this life, but for those that don't or for those who have been wrongly harmed, justice must exist or God would be a respecter of persons.“All mankind can be protected by the law of justice, and at once each of us individually may be extended the redeeming and healing blessing of mercy."(LDS Aaronic Priesthood Manual--http://www.lds.org/manual/aaronic-priesthood-manual-3/lesson-9-justice-and-mercy?lang=eng)So even when God has to judge us it is out of love to create the most fair situation for all involved. And, God is the only one that knows our hearts, background, personality, and tendencies to judge us perfectly and give us the most "slack" for our mistakes. Furthermore, He provided the Savior to pay the price to fill in the gaps where our best wasn't sufficient.“Unless there is a mediator, unless we have a friend, the full weight of justice untempered, unsympathetic, must, positively must fall on us. The full recompense for every transgression, however minor or however deep, will be exacted from us to the uttermost farthing. “But know this: Truth, glorious truth, proclaims there is such a Mediator." (LDS Aaronic Priesthood Manual--http://www.lds.org/manual/aaronic-priesthood-manual-3/lesson-9-justice-and-mercy?lang=eng)

As I have gotten older, I have understood what the phrase "living in the world but not of the world" means on an intellectual level. There are so many ideas, concepts, values, and doctrines to sort through to find out who we are and what we believe. At times, the world will try to present ideas to you that are "hand-down", no doubt-about-it, black and white, wrong in your mind--wrong according to your values or prescribed religion. There are other times that the world teaches ideas that seem much more sensitive and complex--ideas that resonate with your desire to achieve justice and mercy, but that still don't meld completely with your values and religion. These ideas that seem to be full of gray--that have so many caveats and special circumstances and exceptions--are what this blog is about. As part of becoming my own person and understanding who I am, I feel I must come to know how to understand the many "gray" ideas of the world because they cannot be ignored just because I am a religious person. There are many social issues present in our culture that are unprecedented in their concept and in the open discussion surrounding them, now that the internet enables ideas to become widespread instantly. If we are living in the world where these issues stand, supported by other humans with desires for justice and mercy and needs to be understood, then we must grapple with these ideas until we find ways to maintain our values and be kind and loving to those who may be different or have different values, because they are still children of God. In my mind, "living in the world but not of the world" means that we can accept others for who they are, extend mercy to them without necessarily agreeing with them or following their same lifestyle, and leave the justice to God. Gay marriage, abortion, women's rights in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and modesty are all among the ideas that I must come to understand but still live by God's laws. In all of these complex issues I have a part of me that really wants justice for those struggling with them--I have someone I love, why shouldn't everyone be allowed the same happiness. However, my faith stands strong and God has made it known that marriage should only be between a man and a wife, and God never changes. One idea I have seen in many blogs and articles lately is the idea/hope that one day the church will change its stance on gay marriage or eventually give in and give women the Priesthood. I believe the reference point is the 1978 change in church policy to allow all worthy males to hold the Priesthood. However, that was a policy change--not a change of doctrine or God's laws. I don't believe we can use that hope to discount the words of prophets of God or church leaders, thinking "with enough protesting and discussion, their eyes will finally be opened." I testify that their eyes are open wider than any of ours ever could be. Through communication with the Lord, they know and understand exactly what issues, heartaches, evils, and goodness exist in the world, and I am sure they have felt the emotions and complexity that comes with each. They just know that the justice of God must set a standard to measure our hearts against in order to be fair. Setting the standard of no gay marriage and no Priesthood for women does not mean they do not understand the issue or that they are judging or hateful toward anyone that struggles with these concepts. It just means that the way God designed his plan was for men to marry women and for men and women to have separate roles (both of the grandest responsibility and honor) in this life. When church leaders speak on these difficult and complex issues they are not saying that you are a sinner if you understand both sides of any of these challenging concepts. They are not even saying that you are a sinner if you are attracted to someone of the same gender or if you really feel a desire to have the Priesthood as a woman. They draw the line at what you do with these ideas. Feeling attracted to a member of the same sex is very different than having sexual relations or impure thoughts with or about that person. Feeling a desire to have recognition and power as a woman is different than openly speaking ill of leaders of the church that have been called by God or rebelling against gospel doctrine. Every person on this Earth has struggles with desires that are against what God has told us is good and right. I think the real issue is what we do with those desires. Do we act on them though God has told us they are not part of His plan? If not, then we have done nothing contrary to His will. Even if you chose to act against the teachings of Christ, church leaders, church members, and God still love you. It is devastating to me when I hear stories of "Christians" acting in the contrary, but we must remember that humans are human and cannot always love as perfectly as God or have the same mercy He has. However, I think this concept of church leaders just being men is sometimes taken a little too far. Yes. Church leaders are men with weaknesses and their own opinions that may not necessarily be gospel doctrine. However, in something like general conference where they have months to prepare their message and speak with the Lord about it and review it with many people, I believe they are speaking for the Lord and we cannot automatically discount something we don't want to hear as "their opinion" rather than doctrine. I do know that God and church leaders alike would have you pray about anything they teach to gain a testimony of it yourself. Truth stands immortal. When we pray to know the truth and how to live it we will feel of the power of truthfulness and feel of the Love of God in knowing that as long as we are doing our best both justice and mercy will prevail in the end. Some people have struggles that are harder than others and some people (like me) may need more mercy than others to fill in the gaps of their many weaknesses. Justice and mercy enable each of us to live in this world of different circumstances, struggles, and desires and come out of it with the same fair benefits--stronger, more humble, and more merciful if that is what we desire. Though we all have different circumstances, struggles and weaknesses, we are all promised the same peace and love through the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Living in the world but not of the world means we try to understand the struggles each child of God has without trying to tell God what to do or how to change His plan. It is not our job to judge any person for any struggle they may have, but it is our job to love them and love and follow our leaders as we uphold the values and truths of God's plan.

Modesty in an Immodest World

Modesty has seen times change in big ways over the last century or so. Some may think it is out-dated. Some may think it is frumpy. For many, modesty seems to be a foreign concept for both body and mind. It sometimes seems normal to be disrespectful to authority, open about our bodies in inappropriate and pornographic ways, and even jokingly loud and crude. But, as the scriptures say, God "is the same yesterday, today, and forever." It seems to me lately that many people have been using the announcement of 1978 that all worthy males could receive the Priesthood to justify the discounting of prophetic counsel, thinking that if we petition certain social issues and protest enough then the doctrines of the church may eventually change. While I do not rule out the idea that church policy may change, I know with certainty that the doctrine never will. Modesty is a principle of the gospel that enables us to become disciples of Christ. Modesty is to be expected of both men and women in deed and thought and the expectation of God for every person to be in charge of their own purity will always stand.

Many seem to have taken offense at a recent talk given by one church leader, Elaine Dalton given on the power of modesty in young women(see http://www.lds.org/broadcasts/article/general-young-women-meeting/2013/03/be-not-moved?lang=eng&query=be+not+moved)

One quote from this talk states: "Young women, make sure your relationships with others are such that 40 years from now, you will not be embarrassed. No amount of peer pressure, no acceptance, no popularity is worth a compromise. Your influence on the young men will help them remain worthy of their priesthood power, of temple covenants, and of serving a mission. And who knows? Forty years from now, you may even have one of them walk up to you, there in your high school auditorium, and thank you for helping him remain worthy to fulfill his priesthood duty to serve an honorable mission. And who knows? You may even receive a letter from one of those young men’s wives, thanking you for the influence you had on her husband and their future family clear back in your high school days. Your choices matter. Your choices now not only affect you, but they also affect others. They are of eternal significance. Be not moved!"

This quote and idea of helping young men mentions nothing specifically about modestly and precedes her paragraph about modesty as a separate idea.

Almost every blog or article I have read criticizing this talk and the doctrine have seemingly misunderstood the intended message. Most blogs have quoted this section in regards to modesty. Her guidance about modesty follows in another sub-heading of the talk as another example of standing fast in our values. In the following paragraph about modesty, no mention of responsibility over controlling the thoughts of males is ever mentioned--only blessings that will come to our OWN lives from living modestly. A direct quote follows:

"Second, be not moved in your desire and commitment to remain virtuous and sexually pure. Cherish virtue. Your personal purity is one of your greatest sources of power. When you came to the earth, you were given the precious gift of a body. Your body is the instrument of your mind and a divine gift with which you exercise your agency. This is a gift that Satan was denied, and thus he directs nearly all of his attacks on your body. He wants you to disdain, misuse, and abuse your body. Immodesty, pornography, immorality, tattoos and piercings, drug abuse, and addictions of all kinds are all efforts to take possession of this precious gift—your body—and to make it difficult for you to exercise your agency. Paul asks, “Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?”

Even if the two thoughts had been connected and Elaine Dalton explicitly stated that women should dress modestly to help men have pure thoughts, the key word is HELP. She does say that we can have a good influence over men so that they may later thank us for helping them remain pure. It is not unreasonable to think that one way we can help men remain pure is to dress modestly. However, she never says that "helping" men by dressing modestly absolves them entirely from any responsibility over their thoughts or actions.

If I had a friend that I cared deeply about who had struggled his or her whole life with being overweight and finally came up with the resolve to make a plan to eat healthy food and lose excess weight, I would want to support them in any way I could. In the process of supporting them, would I invite them over and eat a heaping bowl of ice cream with cookies and gooey caramel drizzled on top? No! If I chose to eat a decadent dessert in front of them and they decided to join me in enjoying dessert would it absolve them from all responsibility and the consequences of such a choice? No! They would still have to work out their own way to find new resolve and burn those empty calories they maybe shouldn't have consumed. We cannot control their thoughts or their choices, but we can certainly make it easier for them to stick to their resolve and their goals by refraining from eating ice cream in front of them. Now, you may find flaws in this comparison, but the principle is the same: we can all (males and females alike) make small but impacting choices along the path of life to help ourselves and others along our path to personal purity. Living the gospel of Jesus Christ in this world is about love. Loving ourselves and loving others. Truly loving ourselves and others means respecting our bodies as beautiful creations of God rather than things to be "used" for sexual gratification. Justice keeps track of every impure thought that occurs (with or without intention of the wearer of immodest clothing and/or the thinker of the thought) and mercy shows us that God and His Son, Jesus Christ understand our hearts--maybe we don't realize our shirt hung open when we bent over, maybe a man accidentally looked and couldn't get it out of his head, maybe we just need mercy to fill in the gaps of misunderstanding if we heard the words of an inspired leader and felt they were mean-hearted or judgmental (because I cannot believe they were). Every time I hear the words of church leaders or pray to my Heavenly Father I feel so deeply of their love for every person on this Earth--whether they are ready to hear it or not. EVERY SINGLE TIME a prophet of God or a leader of His church speaks on any topic they are trying to lead each of us to a path of peace and happiness. I hope that no one ever feels rebuked in hatred, but rather that they are lovingly guided toward goodness. I pray that we may all be more modest in our dress, thoughts, and hearts because modesty is more than just what we put on our bodies--it is a respect and reverence for things that are holy. And may we each resolve to try a little harder to help ourselves and others along our path to purity and to have a deeper respect for all things holy.